ɪ ᴀᴍ ᴛʜᴇ ɴᴏʀᴛʜ sᴛᴀʀ

Sometimes, writing everything out makes me feel better. My head is getting kinda dizzy.

When I read this.. well, it's some kind of weird unknown journal, The Chicago Underground or something. But yeah... when I read it, I only just realised how complicated this city is. I always kinda stayed out of Politics back home, but this is... it's just so much more here. This is something I never really thought I'd be able to imagine, let alone comprehend.

I thought the Rift was my main problem here in Chicago, dealing with powers I don't really want. I mean, I can guess how people might find turning invisible, making these pitch black smog screens and making shadow animals fascinating or whatever. But sometimes, I.. I just don't see the point. I didn't ask for them and I've never really wanted them, but I can't really do anything about it. I have to deal with them, I guess.

But no, that's not my main worry any more.

The whole angels and demons thing as well as the CLF.. it's really scary. It's like.. on top of everything.. there's some kind of war going on. Everyone's just fighting for so many different things. This is serious... this is... it's just something I would've never ever thought about. There's just so much more that's going on here. I feel kinda stupid for not paying as much attention. I guess I've just been scared of stuff, maybe. But right now, I just get the feeling that Wanderers are getting caught up in angels' and demons' wars and I'm worried for everyone. Most of the people I know, the people who're my friends in this city, are Wanderers and I really worry for them. I really do.

I don't even know what I'm saying any more. This.. this just sucks so bad.

I just wish people would stop fucking fighting. I'm just so, so tired now.


Also... I don't know what a 'Neqa'el' is... erm. Firsts is something familiar... is a Neqa'el like, the demon version of a First or something?